Thursday, June 28, 2012

Tis the season

LADIES, summer in all its humid glory is upon us once more, demanding the observance of this most tedious personal ritual...yes you're right, the dreaded daily shaving of the legs. Even if you are not regular skirt wearers, some of you are year round slaves to the practice but my belief is that one of the chief function of jeans, aside from making your butt look good while hiding cellulite and making free movement possible, is to allow one to go unshaven for weeks on end.

In the beginning of my relationship, I whipped through boxes of razorblades every month, due to frequency of shaving and the fact that my leg hair was as coarse as a bear. 25 years down the road, as is inevetible — the bloom is somewhat off the rose — the frequency is not so much and (one blessing of getting older) my leg hair has thinned substantially.

But come the hot weather the water beckons to me and I must heed its call without grossing others out and so the ritual is practiced with more regularity. But this wasn't always the case...

Guy: "Say, what's a nice little thing like you doing here all alone?"
Me: Enjoying myself
Guy: "I mean you're not a bad looking woman...mmm,mmm NOT BAD AT ALL."
ME: This calls for drastic measures
ME: Leg hair was invented for times like this.
This cartoon was done during my deep commitment to the feminist, earth mother-godess ideals of the times; to shave one's legs was sacrilege. And, though at any other pool in Victoria back then, I would catch nary a glance from the opposite sex, for some reason this particular establishment drew some guys desperately on the prowl. Maybe it was the odd half wall between the hot tub and the lap pool which afforded a nice vantage point for the gawkers, encouraging their bold outright stares; I don't know.

Aside from this petty annoyance the pool was fabulous, large and with a skylight over it allowing the sun to shine in, plus it was open late into the night for that before bed swim (hmmm, O.K. maybe that was part of this pools allure for this type of character). Anyway...

I'm serious about my workouts and have never used pools, gyms or weight rooms to socialize or hook up with anyone. Having been a former weight-training instructor I have no time for men or women using such places as dating venues. I exude the air of, Don't mess with me when I'm doing my thing. I like to be left alone. When swimming or resting between laps at the end of the pool, if I felt in any way that I was going to be approached I'd just get out and the dark, shaggy, soggy leg hair clinging to my calves would work its magic — instant man repellant!

Yikes! Technical difficulties - I've got a new scanner and the image is terrible. I need to get it sorted out!!! The image is blurry and can't be enlarged so I've typed it out as you can see. Words in italics are thoughts (see the little circles coming from my head?)

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