KEEPING THE WOLVES AT BAY

I woke up today with a dream that had occurred on many levels, containing strong and unsettling sensations. It was one of those dreams that you just want to shoo under the bed and ignore, but the feeling hung upon me like a heavy weight. This sense remained even after I'd recorded the dream and done the lightning dreamwork process I've learned from Robert Moss. I realized that in order to go deeper I needed to re-enter the dream as I lay there in a still somewhat hypnogogic state. As I re-entered my dream I found myself taking a broad overview in that:

1.  I viewed what was occurring from a higher vantage point in terms of my visual perspective
2.  I saw the dream events happening concurrently 

Immediately this phrase came into my head I'M KEEPING THE WOLVES AT BAY; accompanied by a strong visceral sensation of physical tension and exhaustion.

Though there were no wolves in the dream the peoples in it were like wolves who had trapped their prey (I and my people) as they gathered and awaited in a bay offshore in huge galleons prepared to attack our small, peaceful, agrarian island. We had no choice but to surrender. I was organizing the colony to prepare a welcome. I would go out to meet our conquerors and arrange terms takeover and peaceful co-habitation. As I set out I was somewhat relieved and optimistic (this threat must have been hanging over us for a long time) perhaps some good will come of this I told myself.

As soon as I committed that phrase to paper I felt relief as an AH HA moment washed over me. The feeling in my dream and the one crawling under my skin were congruent and had been named. That's how I'm feeling, accompanied by a sense of loss and sorrow (the latter emotions are not new to me, they arise just before Christmas every year). I told myself, just get through it (these emotions) you know it will pass as it always does, but today I agreed to rather let it and all associated thoughts, sensations and emotions pass through me because it will pass as it always does and went about the day's activities mindful of this intention.

This afternoon during a pre-shiatsu discussion my client comments that she's KEEPING THE WOLVES AT BAY with self-care preventative measures so that she won't have more difficulty later on or have to resort to more invasive therapy after recently suffering a motor vehicle accident.

OK you've got to look deeper into this, I told myself.

So here's what I found:

• If you keep the wolves at bay you make enough money to avoid going hungry or falling heavily into debt (UsingEnglish.com)
• TO KEEP AT BAY - to keep someone or something at a safe distance - the bay tree was supposed to have protective powers and it is said that the bay laurel was used as a remedy during the time of the Great Plague of London. Abai is the Old French word for "barking of hounds in a pack" the English word baying as of hunting hounds shares the root. This source goes on to talk about French idioms connected with stag hunting used when the stag tires of the chase and turns to face the pursuing hounds and at this point the stag is itself at bay as it holds the hounds at bay which conveys the sense of the English phrase. Source: http://users.tinyonline.co.uk/gswithenbank/sayindex.htm